According to the fengshui masters, flowers in bloom
    facing east, bring health. A three-legged toad
    by the front door, means luck. For you, not the toad.

    To tap scholastic wit, stand in the magnetic centre
    of the house, locate the south corner and move your desk
    there, blindfolded. Avoid aquariums in the bedroom; they activate

    loss, unless you introduce an even number of fish
    to absorb your doom. If they die
    you know they've done their work. Place a water dragon

    in your garden, not to ward off strangers, but to fetch
    hidden wealth. If you live in an apartment,
    make do in the corridor. Let each family member eat

    facing his or her most auspicious direction. Conversation
    is optional. There is no formula for laughter.
    This is serious business: do not expect miracles overnight;

    wait at least seven times seven days. Be content with lack,
    so the stars tell us. Or else stand there quietly, in moonlight,
    facing west, for a change. Bring someone else an augury of fortune.

30 August 2001   11:59 hours
envy { } incendium amoris